


39.115 Days

by Rae_Saxon



Category: Doctor Who & Related Fandoms
Genre: F/M, Gallifrey having been blown up? - Somewhat relevant, Gallifrey set, Idiots in Love, Jack will be civil... somewhat... to his abilities, Jealousy, Longing, Pining, Reforming!Master .... somewhat... to his abilities... he hasn't blown anything up lately, Slow Burn, The Doctor being the Timeless Child? - Not so much, because I hate Jack in most Doctor/Master stories, communication problems, no au
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-12
Updated: 2020-09-05
Packaged: 2021-03-06 00:27:59
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 9,459
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25864357
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rae_Saxon/pseuds/Rae_Saxon
Summary: The Doctor hasn't seen the Master in a bit more than 107 years.She hadn't meant to count the days. It just happened. Time Lord burden. Not because she misses him or anything. She's alone. She's miserable. He's disappeared off the face of the universe. Mostly, because she didn't look on Gallifrey. In her defense, she had thought it was destroyed.It wasn't. It's fine. So are the Time Lords. For reasons. (Now really, they WILL come up)They're inviting her for a dance. An invitation she simply can't say no to. If you get the drift. She really cannot. The Master is there. Pining starts. Pining started 107 years ago, but again, you get my drift.Marked explicit for later chapters? Because I iiiimagine I will write something explicit. Pining Time Lords need sexy times, right?
Relationships: The Doctor & Jack Harkness, The Doctor/The Master (Doctor Who), Thirteenth Doctor/The Master (Dhawan)
Comments: 20
Kudos: 63





	1. An invitation

**Author's Note:**

> Listen, the only time I successfully written a slow burn story was several years ago in German for another fandom, so it's.. it's time, right? It's time! Just.... don't get your hopes up. I might decide I suck at slow-burn and end up producing a reasonably-paced burn instead. Urgh. But I'll tryyyy. Because I love slow-burn so much, it eats me up from the inside. Slowly. And longingly. 
> 
> Jack & The Doctor will be purely platonic. It's fine. He's resigned to his fate. I'm sorry, too. But we all know she wants the Master.

_39.115 Days..._

She must've looked pretty messed up when Jack finally rescued her from the Judoon prison. To be fair, it had been rather rough. He had been his usual cheerful self, aged a little, which was nice, good for him. She imagined he must feel a little less stuck, a little less like the paradox he was.

She still felt completely stuck. Stuck in a cell, even when he broke it open with a wide grin. Stuck in herself, a mind with no memories of such an essential part of her past, her lives. Stuck in space, drifting, alone, without a home, without her oldest friend, because he had done it yet again, abandoned her, betrayed her, turned into her best enemy.

She let out a sigh. Jack's expression had quickly shifted into one of worry and pity and it was still haunting her. It had been good to see him, it really had been. He was a welcome reminder of her past, of a past she actually remembered, of something... something that had been so important to her old selves. But she had changed so much, she didn't quite know how to handle it anymore.

He had taken her hands when she had dropped him off, looked into her eyes with that seriousness he only showed to few, only showed the ones he really cared about and had whispered, „Doctor, if you ever need a friend... just find me. Please. You don't have to be alone. You know that. I'm always here.“

He was right, of course. God, he had been there, at the end of everything, he had been there when her first trace of Gallifrey had returned to life and caged them in, had been there to defend her, to go on adventures with her, had warned her before anyone else could, had given her his last secret, a message from one lonely traveller to another and he would probably still be there when she wasn't anymore.

But he wasn't home, he didn't smell of red grass and twin suns, he smelled of paradox.

She sighed, running her hand over her forehead.

Then why was she here?

She let her glance wander back to the hypercube currently lying on her console, just once, just shortly, as if she was scared it might burn her.

She hadn't been able to activate it, wasn't sure if she could take it, no matter who it was from, what it entailed. Was it a message from the Master? A mocking? Another threat? More hollow words? Or was it a call for help, some surviving Time Lord who had tried to return home only to find it burnt to the ground? Or, worse even, was it a call for help from a time long gone, was it a dead soul pleading for their life? More lies from the Matrix, more truths, truths she couldn't take right now?

Whatever it was, it wasn't home. It was nothing but an empty shell, a painful reminder that home had once existed and was now forever gone, out of reach for all of eternity.

God, she was so tired.

That's why she was here, wasn't she? Jack now was the closest she had. A person out there who knew more than her name and a vague myth of a saviour that came along with it. Jack had known her as a traveller, as a coward, as a broken romantic, as someone holding the cold body of his tormentor, weeping, Jack knew the worst of her and that was, maybe, the closest she'd ever get to Gallifrey.

Everyone loved to see the best in her, but they had known better. Oh, they had, because they had been just as dark, just as ruthless, just as cruel.

She had tried to escape that reality for far too long. It was time to face herself, time to find herself again.

The Doctor took a long breath and pushed open her TARDIS door.

The air was chilly, the little side alley dark. She buried her hands in her coat pockets, walking down the street with a little, calming hum on her lips, following the soft music in the air and the sounds of voices, until she found the little squares of light burning through the night.

The bar didn't mind the quiet, heavy night outside. The atmosphere was light and fun, people chatting and drinking excitedly, not a lonely soul to find. She strode through it with a little smile on her face, the closeness to people always cheering her up, seeping through to her lonely bones, and found Jack in the middle of a large group, laughing loudly and telling stories.

That was her old friend. Always the centre of attention, always ready to leave the sadness behind for some hours of laughing, even if the universe was working against him.

His eyes found hers immediately and the Doctor waved gently, before turning to order a Screwdriver.

Jack regarded it with a light smirk when he finally stepped out of the crowd towards her.

“You had no idea what to order, did you?”

„It looked appealing to me,” she replied with a shrug and a grin. She took a sip under his inquiring glance and winced as the bitter vodka hit her tongue.

“Ew.”

“Yeah, you're never gonna be a drinker,” he laughed, turning towards the barkeeper with a wink. “Hey, Andrew, a Virgin Colada for the lady, and I'll...“ he gently took the glass off her hands, „will be having that.”

A smirk played around her lips. „Thanks.”

“Always.” Jack leant against the counter, elbow on the wood as he regarded her from top to toe. “You look different.”

“No, I don't,” she frowned. “Did I get the timing wrong? I thought I've done it right.”

“No,“ he reassured her quickly. “I didn't mean the body. I mean you look... I don't know. Older.“

 _Sadder_ , she thought. _Just say it._

“How long has it been to you?” he asked, trying to cover his concern with a sip from the screwdriver. He didn't wince while emptying almost a quarter of the glass. She watched it disappear through the straw, trying not to listen to the little counter in her head.

_39.112 days._

“Oh, I'm not sure,” she replied instead. “A few years. You know me, always on the run.” She gave it her best attempt at a convincing grin but Jack knew her too well to fall for it.

He just nodded.

“On your own?”

“Well. I met this couple, they were with me for a while. Nice people. They want to adopt a child now. Probably have by now, I imagine. Always been their dream, apparently.” She smiled. “I dropped them off a bit in their future. Earth can be so terribly backwards sometimes.”

Jack raised an eyebrow.

“Isn't that a tad critical for time? I met a Time Lord once, terribly uptight chap, who told me there are rules against this sort of thing.”

The Doctor's grin turned a bit more solid now, a bit more genuine.

“He _does_ sound uptight. Y'know what Molly and Jill taught me?”

“What?” Jack asked, visibly amused.

She leaned over to him and whispered with wide eyes, “Be gay. Do crime.”

Jack snorted into his drink. He was still laughing when he put it down, his eyes glittering. He always seemed so alive, she didn't know how he did it. He was living the same curse as she was. Always the last person alive on a battlefield, always watching the people he loved die. Always without a home.

“They sound like very sensible people, Molly and Jill.”

“Oh, they are. They'll be great mums.”

She took a sip of the drink Jack had ordered for her and her eyes widened. It was sweet and creamy and not a single drop of alcohol ruined the taste for her. She grinned happily, almost drinking it in one go, while Jack watched her with an amused smile.

“So... what leads you to me? Really? Because I know it's not gonna be small talk over a gay couple you met two years ago.”

“Ninety-eight,” she gave back without thinking, her head still focused on the taste on her tongue and they both looked at each other in equal shock.

“You said ' _a few years_ ',” he finally exclaimed in an accusatory tone.

“Well, I...” the Doctor muttered, trying to find an excuse and then let her shoulders sink a little. “Lied. A little bit.”

“I'd say so,” Jack narrowed his eyes, but she simply rolled hers.

“I just don't like that look, alright?”

“Which look?” he replied, while giving her The Look.

The Doctor rolled her eyes a little harder.

“That one!”

“I'm simply worried-”

“Exactly. Worried. Hate it.”

“It's just... you know you're getting a bit... dark when you're alone.”

“Well, it's not my fault he blew up my planet and then didn't show his face again for 39.115 days!” she spluttered out, louder than she had intended. The words she hadn't even wanted to say out loud had come out as a little shout. A few heads, including Andrew's, turned to her and she quickly grabbed her glass again, hands shaking, and pretended to get drunk.

It helped the burning pain in her chest a little.

“Okay,” Jack replied after a little moment of silence, a crooked grin appearing on his face. “And here I thought you were here to see me.”

“Sorry. Sorry,” she sighed. “I am. Of course I am.”

“That mysterious 'him' that... blew up Gallifrey and then disappeared for what appears to be over a hundred years...”

She poked around in the cocktail with her straw darkly.

“Am I right to assume we're talking about the Master here?”

“I don't know where he is,” she resigned herself, finally spoke the words she had forbidden herself to say before coming here, out of respect for Jack, out of self-respect, hell, for Gallifrey. “I don't know what he's doing. If he's alive. I can't find him anywhere. My scanners pick up nothing. No Time Lord life sign.” _Again_. “He told me things. Things I still haven't processed. Destroyed our home. And then just... just... Disappeared on me.” _Abandoned me_.

“Have you tried following the trail of destruction and terror to find him?” Jack offered in sarcastic helpfulness.

The Doctor sighed.

“Actually... yeah. Never did turn out to be his, though. He rarely does anything without me around, he's a bit of a... Show-off.”

“Maybe he found a new toy to torment?” Jack said in the same tone and the Doctor simply... shrugged.

“Maybe.”

“That's a good thing, right? Being free of him?” Jack tried again and this time, the Doctor let her hang, staring into her almost empty drink.

He didn't understand. Of course he didn't. This was exactly the reaction she had expected, she had tried to avoid. He had every right to think that way. God, he was being nothing but perfectly reasonable to do so. But... Well, she hadn't felt reasonable for a very long time.

“Me being free of him means someone else isn't. That's not good, not for them,” she replied because surely, surely, he would understand that.

But Jack simply raised an eyebrow in scepticism.

“That's not what you're concerned about, though, is it?”

She shrugged again, non-committal, finishing her drink. It had lost taste, somehow.

Jack sighed.

“So, why _are_ you here?” he asked again. “I haven't seen him, if that's what you wanted to know. I might be miserable, but not desperate.”

“No, that's not...” She shook her head. “No. I got a message. Gallifreyan. But... Gallifrey is gone and I'm... I'm...”

His face softened, concern back on it and she hated it, she hated it just as much as that word she simply didn't manage to speak.

“Scared?” he asked gently.

Somehow it felt even worse with him saying it, the panic whirling around in her stomach, tying up her chest, taking away her breath, the feeling of something sitting on her chest, slowly choking the joy out of her, as desperation grew.

She nodded, shortly, quickly, as if lack of acknowledgement would make it disappear.

She was the Doctor. The Doctor didn't get scared. Not ever.

But Jack was right. The idea of listening to this message, whatever it may be, it terrified her to her bones.

 _What if he's dead?_ she thought, not speaking it, because she couldn't and because she knew what Jack would say.

_Good._

_But what if he's really dead?_ And what if he was alive? Wouldn't that, somehow, incomprehensibly, be worse? Wouldn't that mean that he had finally... finally given up on her?

Jack finished his drink, letting it knock back onto the counter with a dull sound.

“Come on, then.”

He turned to Andrew with his most charming smile and another wink.

“I'll pay you later, if that's alright, pretty.”

Andrew rolled his eyes but a little smile played around his lips.

The Doctor followed him out of the dusty little bar and as he waved the people, laughed and joked his way through them, grinned apologetically at their exclaims of disappointment for him leaving, as she tore him out of his life one more time, to help her with the trail of darkness that was always following her, she couldn't help the sinking feeling that she really, really didn't deserve Jack.

“Come on, Doctor, we can't sit here, staring at this thing forever?”

“No. I know,” she replied without looking up. “But maybe... a little longer?”

Jack grabbed it off the console and pressed it into her arms.

“Open it. It's time. You gotta know or it will drive you insane.”

 _It already has,_ she thought darkly, but she knew he was right regardless. With a deep breath, she took the cube back into her hands, closed her eyes and concentrated. A simple telepathic command and it opened in front of them in glaring light.

The first thing she realised was that she didn't recognise the voice. Not the Master, then. Even if he had regenerated, she'd... somehow know, she was sure. He had fooled her so many times, but the truth was, when the Master truly _wanted_ her to see him, she always would.

Then she took in the words of the message.

“ _Hello Doctor. You are warmly invited to the festivities to celebrate the finished rebuilt of the Citadel. We have enclosed dress code and time coordinates to the message. If you require dance lessons, please come four weeks before the opening. We will have a room ready for you, as we are very aware that you will require dancing lessons. A dancing partner will also be required. Attendance is obligatory for every Gallifreyan citizen. Especially ones that blew up the planet. Twice. That means you, Doctor. We will be seeing you.”_

_Click._

Resounding silence settled in the TARDIS around them as the Doctor stared in shock down at the little cube on her console. A hologram appeared before her, listing the coordinates and the dress code and she read it in disbelief, still barely processing the words and numbers before her.

“Sooooo...” Jack broke the silence. “Looks like we're going dancing?”

She looked up, having almost forgotten that he was here. “What?”

“Dancing. You. Me. Unless you have a better partner?”

“I think they meant Time Lords,” she muttered, but Jack just wriggled his eyebrows.

“They should've specified then. They seem like... very specifying people.”

A little smirk twitched over her confused face.

“I don't understand,” she finally brought out. “I just... last time... they were... and he had... I mean... the Cybermen... and boom...”

“Boom?” Jack repeated with a laugh.

“They shouldn't be... but this seems...”

She scanned it, frowning. “I think it's... recent. I don't understand.”

“So you said.” Jack read the dress code with a frown. “I'd say we'll get you a ball gown and check it out.”

“A... excuse me, _what_?” She tore around the cube to face the hologram, her face scrunching up as she read the instruction Jack was pointing at.

“Why can't I wear a suit!” she asked, outraged, and Jack snickered.

“Hey, look at the positive side.” He bumped her in the side with an elbow and a twinkle in his eyes, enjoying her shock visibly.

“And what's that?” she muttered, finally closing the message.

“Attendance is obligatory for people who blew up Gallifrey.”

“How's that positive?” she frowned, trying not to imagine the frosty reception she'd get.

But Jack's grin widened.

“Because it means the Master will be there.”


	2. Home sweet Home

The Doctor was barely seeing the dresses Jack had picked out for her, she simply sat there, on the comfy couch in the snobby little boutique they were in, staring right through them. She was still holding the purple-black dress she had picked out earlier, barely paying attention to the fabric wrinkling in her fidgeting grip.

He let his arms sink with a heavy sigh.

“Come on, Doctor, that's the third time I showed you the same dress and you haven't even noticed.”

She let her eyes flicker up to him with a guilty expression on her face.

“Sorry. I just... I still don't understand. You weren't there. You didn't see how... how lost it was. Gallifrey. It's like nothing happened, like I was just... imagining a timeline.”

Truth was, her head was in a complete mess. So many memories that weren't hers but hers, whirling around, the things he had showed her in the matrix, the Cyber-Lords emitting regeneration energy, the explosion, the end of it all, the pain, blinding her once again, the guilt crashing down on her, even if she hadn't been responsible, not really, not this time.

It was difficult, to keep track of what was real now, with Gallifrey back in the skies and the Time Lords as snarky and apparently un-cybered as ever.

Jack sat down next to her, taking her hands.

“I know that. But you never will understand unless we go there, you realise that, right?”

She nodded. How could she make him understand? How could she make him understand how scary it all was? The thought that it could just be another trap, another dagger into one of her hearts, a false hope and how could she make him understand that it not being that way could almost be... even scarier?

“Okay,” she finally sighed, trying to focus as she pulled her hands out of his grip, gesturing towards the dress he had laid out. “You really want me to take that one, yeah?”

“I just thought you'd like it. It's TARDIS blue.” He smirked at her gently and she couldn't help but smile back, just a little.

Everything was only half as terrifying with a good friend by her side.

She got up, held it up to her body and gave it an insecure frown.

“You know, I don't think I'm a dress person at all.”

“I'm not a suit person either, but I'm doing it for you... and because you won't give me one of those sweet Time Lord robes that were on the dress code.”

The Doctor's lips twitched.

“Are you insane? A human showing up in Time Lord robes? They'll murder you.”

Jack stopped tugging at his own smoking with a raise of his eyebrows towards her and the Doctor broke out into a grin.

“Okay, yes, fair, they can't really do that. But that won't stop them from trying.”

“For what it's worth,” Jack grinned. “I think dresses suit you just fine.”

“TARDIS blue is a good compromise, I suppose,” the Doctor sighed as she looked down at herself one last time, then grinned at Jack. “But only if you wear your suspenders under your smoking jacket.”

Jack snorted.

“Can do.”

She was running up and down, up and down, always drawn back to the lever to start dematerialisation, always hectically running away from it before her hand could rest on it.

Jack had been watching her for the last half hour. He could easily simply push her into it, press the lever for her and bring them straight to Gallifrey, but he didn't.

She imagined this was something entirely new for him and it almost made her laugh. Brave, bold, adventurous, fearless Doctor – Getting hysterical at the prospect of going home.

“They're mean,” she exclaimed, whirling around towards him. “You're prepared for that, right? They're gonna be mean. You're a human. They don't want humans on their racist little planet. And you're a human that feel _wrong_.”

Jack shrugged.

“I think I can handle mean, Doc.”

“Right...” she muttered, walking up and down again, her arms swinging. “Right.”  
  
“And so can you,” he reminded her and really, she kinda needed that.

“I can,” she called, turning around to him again in one sweeping motion. “I just...”

She let her arms fall back to her sides.

“Feel guilty?” Jack offered.

The Doctor took a deep breath.

“Yeah. And it's... you know...”

“Scary to face it instead of running from it?”

 _Okay_ , the Doctor thought. _Maybe not so new for him. Maybe not a surprise at all._

Maybe he knew her better than she was willing to admit sometimes. Truth was, she had perfected keeping her companions at perfect distance, always close enough to get attached, always far enough to not let them see the worst of her, but Jack... ah damn, they'd gotten old. He just knew her for too long.

“Know what. This is stupid,” she finally called out, collecting herself, stepping back to the lever, forcing herself not to flee yet again. “They did horrendous things to u...- me. W...- I did horrendous things to them. We're even. Let's go.”

In a sudden urge of determination, she finally pressed down the lever, leaving Jack no warning as the TARDIS started moving and he was thrown out of the chair and against the reeling.

As soon as the ship stopped, the Doctor had jumped towards the door, a wide grin on her face and her coat swooshing behind her.

“Coming?” she asked. “Everyone's waiting for us!”  
  
Jack, face still pressed against the metal, mumbled something that dully sounded like “Some things just never change.”

They stepped out into a huge hall, filled with people and ships of all kinds. However, the second the Doctor had pushed open the door, everyone around them turned around, staring in absolute silence.

Jack, who had been excited for his first official glance of Gallifrey, gulped.

“Uhm,” the Doctor spoke into the heavy silence. “Hi.”

She couldn't help but search for him. Here she was, in the entrance hall of the planet she had thought forever gone (again), surrounded by people she had thought were dead and gone, looking for the one person responsible, frantically.

But there was no sight of the Master and the Doctor, feeling disappointed against her will, let out a breath she hadn't even known she was holding.

A man stepped out of the frozen crowd, walking up towards them and offering the Doctor his arm.

“Let's walk a bit,” he hissed, before leading her out of the hall, Jack following behind, feeling a bit ignored – A feeling he wasn't facing very often.

“My TARDIS...” the Doctor began, but the man dismissed her concerns with a wave.

“All taken care of.”

They walked through wide, warm aisles and Jack hungrily looked out of every window they passed, down at the dusty roads beneath them, the beautiful mirroring of the glass surrounding the Capitol and the twin suns shining down on them.

The Doctor didn't look quite as happy to be on Gallifrey. She had freed her arm from the man's grip, buried her hands in her pockets and was trotting behind him grumpily.

“Alright, get it out, then. I know you want to.”

The man didn't turn back to her as he walked on, further leading them forwards, but his shoulders tensed as he spoke.

“You brought... a human. Not only a human, but an _anomaly_ , into the Capitol,” he hissed, and the Doctor rolled her eyes at Jack apologetically.

“His name's Jack.”

“He shouldn't exist.”

“But he does,” she replied, calmer than she looked. “So I'm afraid the basic rules of respect still apply.”

“Respect?” the man's voice became shrill now. “ _Respect_? Doctor, please, don't embarrass yourself! He's a fracture in time, a monstrosity, a...”

“He's a person,” the Doctor shouted, opening her mouth to say more, but freezing immediately. They had just walked around a corner and there he stood, _there he stood,_ after years, after a century of searching for him, he just _stood_ there, a hand supported against a wall, face leant down to a woman and a flirtatious smile on his face.

She hadn't thought, hadn't dared, hadn't _wanted_ to ever look for Gallifrey again, yet here he was, must've been all this time, of all the places in the universe, here, all this time, with.... with... her?

 _Who_ the hell was that?

Something like rage shot through her, hot and boiling, leaving her burning as she stared at them, her hands clutched to fists. Somehow it was worse, so much worse, to see him standing there, not even noticing her. He always noticed her. He always chased after her. It wasn't like him, making pretty eyes at everyone else. Hell, he was the Master. He didn't like people.

She had spent so much time looking for him and he hadn't even cared, hadn't even...

“You're blocking the way,” the Time Lord leading them announced, sounding slightly annoyed. “This has been going on for ages,” he added with an eye roll towards the Doctor, who felt her still-clutched hands tremble. She avoided Jack's questioning gaze, feeling it prickling on her skin, her own eyes still completely transfixed on the Master.

He looked just like he had before, but something was still different. He even wore the stupid purple checked waistcoat combo.

She only noticed what was different when he finally looked up, a slight, teasing smile on his lips.

“Oh, sorry, anything you want?”

His voice sounded the same, but... lighter. He seemed lighter all around, he seemed...

Happy.

 _Ouch_.

“I told you,” the man hissed, clearly annoyed now. “You're in the way.”

There was plenty of space and the Doctor, feeling suddenly sick, made her way there as fast as she could, trying to squeeze past the Master without him noticing, which was a ridiculous notion to begin with. He turned his head towards her, she could feel his breath on the side of her cheek, could hear the tiny little intake of air only because they were so close and then she was through and walking to the end of the corridor, leaving him behind.

The Master looked after her for only a second, then turned towards Jack, grimaced, and stepped out of the way quickly, as if trying to avoid a disease.

“You're letting the freak in?” he asked snidely. “Really?”

Jack ignored him with a glare, rushing past him to get to the Doctor.

“I wasn't,” their guide mumbled, looking entirely confused now. “But apparently they didn't get that memo. Excuse me.”

They found the Doctor racing around a second corner, catching up to her quickly, the Time Lord looking rather disgruntled as he raced past Jack to grab her arm. She whirled around looking furious, ripping it away from him, a cold storm visible in her eyes.

Jack smirked.

“Jack is staying. Or I'm leaving. I need him here, he's my partner and I'm not discussing it. End of the story.”

The man opened his mouth, visibly swallowing, then closed it again, apparently deciding that his pride wasn't worth being decapitated.

“Fine,” he finally spit, lips thin as he pinched them together. He pressed two sets of keys into their hands. “I'll leave you to find your rooms yourselves, then.”

He ran away in hasty steps and the Doctor let out a heavy sigh, watching after him as the keys clang in her hands.  
  
“Last place I want to stay, this.”

“It's only until the dance,” Jack reminded her, before offering him his arm to link with hers. “What do you think, Doc, who was he running away from? Me or you?”

She knew he was trying to cheer him up, trying to distract him from what she had seen, but she merely managed a weak smile. Her thoughts were still somewhere in the corridor behind them and as they walked, she couldn't help but feel like someone had run her over with a whole Dalek fleet.

The Doctor lay awake for quite a while that night, staring at the ceiling and wondering how she ended up here all over again. She imagined the solar systems she used to project onto her ceiling back in the Academy, remembered the nights when she wouldn't sneak out with Koschei and how they laid in her bed underneath it, still dreaming of the same old getaway, together.

Was he somewhere in the Citadel right now, lying awake like she was? Wanting to run away or was he... was he really happy here?

A shiver that had nothing to do with cold ran over her and she curled up tighter in her blanket, trying not to think of him running away with... whoever that woman had been. No, he wouldn't – couldn't possibly...

But did she know what he would or wouldn't anymore? He had already been highly unpredictable, so much harder to read, back when everything had fallen apart. And now a century had passed without them talking.

She hadn't even asked. Hadn't even asked how Gallifrey was back, how it was possible for everyone to be alive right now. Had been so caught up in him that she had forgotten everything besides the burning feeling in her guts she still couldn't quite name.

She fought the urge to roll out of bed and go out to look for his room. No point, there was just no point. They weren't these children anymore. She couldn't crawl under his blanket anymore, rest her head on his shoulder and ask him about how he felt that Gallifrey was just... back in the skies as if nothing had happened.

She wasn't sure who they were, now, what they were for each other. But she was sure it wasn't that.

Was he thinking of her right now, too? She hoped so. This was the closest they had been to each other in 39.116 days.

It was an oddly soothing thought.


	3. Bad Ideas

She met Jack in his room the next morning, bringing some tea and muffins in with a cheerful, entirely faked smile as she sat down on the end of his bed.

“Morning sleepyhead,” she greeted him, dropping some muffins in his lap. “Sneaked back into my TARDIS and got us some breakfast. People are going to be... exhausting today, so we better go in prepared.”

“More charming compliments I can look forward to, then?” Jack asked, unpacking one of the muffins with a little smile.  
  
He seemed completely unaffected by any kind of morning sleepiness she was used to from her companions.

The Doctor regarded him with a frown.

“Jack do you... sleep?” she finally asked, as he happily munched on his muffin.

He stopped for a second, eyes flickering up and down her face, before he sighed and dropped the muffin.

“I try to avoid it.”

“Hm,” she hummed, sipping from her tea. “Yeah. Know the feeling.”

“It's just easier, you know...? I don't particularly need it.”

“No, yeah, I know,” the Doctor murmured, trying not to look at him with too much open worry.

The truth was, she knew all about not needing sleep and all about not wanting to sleep and if it had taught her one thing, then it was with how many lonely, tear-filled nights it could leave you with.

“So, I was wondering,” she started, deciding to change the topic, “how good of a dancer are you?”

Jack shrugged, grinning at her cheekily.

“Fairly good. Had a lot of time to learn all the good stuff. No one can compete with my fox trot. Are there specific Gallifreyan dances they'll have us do?”

The Doctor looked like she had just bitten into a lemon. (Slightly overjoyed, but still cringing from the sheer sourness.)

“Yeah, I'm afraid so,” she sighed. “It's a bit mixed with human cultural ball dances, but they'd never admit that.”

Jack snorted.

“Well, I'll pick up on it quickly enough, I'm sure. What about you?”

The Doctor just looked at him, now looking as if she had bitten into a pear. God, she hated pears.

“Ah,” Jack grinned. “Could've thought as much. Doesn't matter. I can lead you, right?”

“Sometimes,” she replied with a shrug. “It's all very ceremonial, with partner exchange and no-touching bits and all that....” She shook her head, sighing. “I never actually paid any attention to it.”

“You don't say,” Jack replied with a shake of his head.

It was odd, sitting here, on Gallifreyan grounds, chatting with Jack about things she had only ever talked about with one person...

“ _Left, right, left, left.. I said left!... Oh my God, Theta, you've got it wrong for the fifth time, you've got to be kidding me.”  
_  
“ _It's not my fault,” the blonde boy cried out in annoyance. “It's a stupid dance! It doesn't make any sense.”  
  
_ _Ushas narrowed her eyes at him. Once in a while, people would giggle at them as they passed by the spot of grass in front of the Academy where they practised the dance for the ceremony. Ushas paid them no mind, but Theta could feel himself growing nervous.  
  
_ “ _It's simple steps, a pattern to learn by hearts. It's not that difficult! It's like you don't even want to learn!”  
  
“Of course I don't,” Theta snorted, crossing his arms before his chest. “I told you. It's stupid.”  
  
Behind them, someone chuckled._

“ _Oh, don't you start!” Theta whirled around, casting the dark haired boy a dark glare. “Unless you know all the steps by heart, I don't want to hear from you!”_

“ _Fine then, Lungbarrow.”_

_And with a swift move, he had grabbed his hands and swept him out of Ushas' embrace, whirling him around to face him. Theta gaped, torn between shouting at him to stop or stepping subtly closer, when Koschei started moving perfectly, every step seemingly coming as easy to him as that stupid, smug smile on his face._

“ _So how's that?” he asked with a wide smirk. “Want to hear from me now?”_

“ _I'd prefer not to,” Theta sneered, but his lips twitched into a treacherous smile. Koschei immediately caught up on it, dark eyes gleaming in amusement as he moved effortlessly with Theta in his arms, and his own smile grew._

“ _When did you learn to dance like this?”_

_Koschei shrugged slightly._

“ _My parents taught me when I was a child. I need to carry the family's honour, many grand openings and balls, blah blah blah.”_

_You're still a child, idiot, he wanted to reply, but just then, Koschei whirled him out of his arms and into freedom, making him almost stumble over his feet in surprise._

“ _This would normally be to switch partners,” Koschei smirked. “But yours seems to have given up.”_

_Indeed, when Theta looked around, Ushas had disappeared._

“ _Well,” he announced with his shoulders sunken in. “I suppose I'll never learn the steps to this in time.”_

_Koschei stepped closer, a finger underneath his chin as he gently raised Theta's head._

“ _And why would you?” he asked, a rare warmth and intensity in his dark eyes, as they looked directly into his. Theta could feel his stomach flip. “It's stupid.”_

  
The Doctor shook her head.

 _Don't think about it_ , she called herself out. _Why would you think about this right now?_

“You alright there?” Jack asked, because oh, of course he would notice.

The Doctor nodded and quickly adjusted her cheerful expression.

“Yeah, sure, sorry, I was just thinking.”

“So...” Jack asked and she knew from his tentative tone what was coming. “The Master, huh?”

She looked down at her fingers, taking a deep breath before looking up, making a decision.

“The Master,” she agreed.

“You're... in love with him, then?”

He might as well know, she told herself. He as good as already did.

“You could say that,” she replied, still looking at her fingers.

“Been going on for a while now?” he asked, still hesitant. She thought about holding his body in her arms, weeping, while Jack stood beside her and sighed.

“Forever. I did tell you we used to be friends, well we...”

_Taking her hand in the middle of the dance, stealing her away from her partner, pulling at her arm, a wide grin on his face, adventure glittering in his eyes and she'd let him, because as much as she hated him, she loved him even more and he dragged her outside, dragged her into freedom and they ran and ran and ran until the lights of the ball, the voices and the music were nothing but the background music to their own little movie and they ran even further, ran and ran and..._

“Ah,” he replied, gently waking her out of her memories and she knew, she just knew of all the things he had to be holding back in that moment.

“I know,” she said, because he deserved that much and Jack nodded in turn.

“I suppose you know this is a very, very bad idea and life decision and should, by no means, be encouraged, ever?” he asked and she looked up, smiling sadly.

“Yes.”

“Fine then,” Jack sighed. “As long as that's clear. You should know he's messing with you, then.”

“He usually is,” the Doctor replied with a frown, before finally looking up, confusion etched onto her face. “Wait, what do you mean?”

“He was up in that lady's face to get a reaction out of you. One hundred percent. He looked far too self-satisfied with himself after.”

“But why would he do that?” the Doctor asked, feeling her throat dry and her hearts jump in painful hope. “He could just talk to me... it's been so long and he wants... wants to play games?”

 _Of course he does, stupid_ , the Doctor thought. _It's all he ever does._

“Because he's an as....-” Jack stopped as he looked into her face, sighing deeply. “An especially... uhm....”

“Big asshole?” the Doctor offered and they both started laughing.

The short moment of harmony was quickly interrupted, however, when someone knocked on Jack's door.

They exchanged a suffering gaze, then the Doctor got up, opened the door and stepped aside, waiting for the thunderstorm to rain down on them.

In stumbled the woman she had seen with the Master yesterday.

The Doctor felt her throat close up immediately and she crossed her arms in front of her chest, trying to protect herself from a blow she knew was about to come.

“I've been looking for you everywhere!” the woman hissed, raising a finger to point at the Doctor, who backed up instantly. “That's just typical, you show up here, unannounced, a day too late, because why would _The Doctor_ RVSP and then you just vanish! Disappear! When we want to give you your instructions!”

“Never been great with instructions,” the Doctor replied grumpily, pushing the finger pointed at her chest to the side. “Or with being shouted at, thank you very much.”

“She was here all morning, maybe you should've thought about checking here?” Jack offered innocently, making the woman jump.

“We are tolerating you right now!” she brought out through gritted teeth. “Don't test your luck.”

“Leave him alone.”

She was feeling inexplicably angry. Which, of course, could be very easily explained by “He was about to be kissing her, her, _her_!” but she didn't allow herself to go there. Instead, she raised her chin in defiance and stepped between the woman and Jack.

“All of you. I am so tired of this. It's not his fault that he's a paradox, it's mine. If you want to insult someone, let it out on me. He's a good person and he's here to help me. I wouldn't be here without him. So take it easy, you hear me?”

To her surprise, the woman let a bit of her tension drain from her, looking defeated. She closed her eyes, one second, then another, taking in a deep breath and calmed herself, before she opened them again to look at Jack, shifting slightly past the Doctor.

“Of course,” she finally conceded. “I'm sorry... Jack, is it? We're all a bit tense. Your fault or not, the paradox is tangible and it's... not a pleasant sensation for Time Lords. My apologies.”

Jack raised his eyebrows. “That's more civil than I expected this to go,” he remarked dryly.

“Yeah,” the Doctor gave back, frowning slightly. “Me too.”

“We're not trying to start a war,” the woman commented with a roll of her eyes. “We're trying to celebrate.”

“And so much to celebrate there is,” the Doctor gave back with a fake smile. “Sudden resurrection and all that. Care to let me in on the secret of _how_?”

“Actually, I was asked not to,” the woman replied shortly. “I'm afraid you'll just have to live with not knowing for once.”

“I... what?” the Doctor spluttered, clearly not comfortable with that foreign concept. “That's ridiculous! You order me here, out of the blue and then don't even tell me how you are all.... _not_ destroyed?”

“Considering you're the person who, I have been informed, felt the need to make re-building a lot harder by blowing up a death particle in our citadel, I don't think we owe you anything, Doctor,” the woman replied harshly, grinning as she watched the Doctor's mouth open, close and open again.

“But _why_?” she finally brought out and the woman raised her arms, shrugging.

“I'm just doing what I was asked, really. In any way, you are asked to attend a dancing course in our third floor ball room today at five, both of you, for us to see your current level and teach Jack here the necessary steps. Please come in time, for once?”

She turned around, heading for the open door and before the Doctor could stop herself, she had called after her.

“Are you going to be there? Dancing with the Master?”

The woman turned around, a deep frown etched onto her forehead. “I already know all the steps, I have no reason to be there, Doctor.” She took another few steps, before stopping in the corridor, turning around once more, a little smile on her face. “Good to see you again.”

“ _Good to see you again,_ ” the Doctor snapped in mocking tone, as she slammed the door shut.

Jack watched her with a frozen face.

“You have absolutely _no_ chill, Doc.”

“I am the chillest person I know!” she replied, mouth agape in offence. “Don't you come at me too!”

But Jack just laughed.

“If you ask questions like that, you'll just give him what he wants. You want to get back at him and get his attention? Be perfectly fine with him ignoring you.”

“And how exactly am I going to do that?” she asked, feeling desperation rising inside her chest. “I'm not sure if you noticed, but I'm not fine.”

She hadn't been in 36.117 days.

“Well, you could start by dancing with your very magnificent partner,” Jack replied with a wide grin. “And see how he feels about that.”

“You want to, what, make him jealous?” the Doctor asked and Jack nodded with wriggling eyebrows.

Alright, so this was a bad idea. A very bad idea. People died when the Master got jealous. Planets burned. But Gallifrey had just put out its fires and Jack was immortal, so she decided to take that as a good sign. An offer from the universe to try this bad idea, if you will.

She smiled gently.

“You'd do that for me?”

“Hell yes,” he grinned. “Everything to get a rise out of that especially big asshole.”

“You're a good friend, you know that?”

His grin widened and he looked at her with his eyebrows still raised, looking incredibly cheerful. Now that she thought about it.... Maybe a little bit _too_ cheerful?

“You want to sleep with _her_ , don't you?”

“I can't help it,” he replied with a laugh. “Have you seen the fire in her eyes? She's beautiful.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guess!! Come on, I dare all of you!! Guess who their dance teacher is!! Come on, you know who it is!! :D


	4. Chapter 4

The whole plan was beginning to make her a bit uncomfortable. She didn't mind the prospect of dancing with Jack – But she really found she didn't like dresses all that much. And wasn't much of a dancer.

“I don't know,” she mumbled for the fifth time in a row. “I don't know, Jack.”

“It looks good on you,” he reassured her with more patience than she had thought he'd have. “You _want_ his attention, don't you?”

That she did. But the idea of clumsily learning her first dance steps in heels and a dress that felt too loose around her... she wasn't quite sure that was the kind of attention she wanted.

“Can we practice first?” she asked, wide-eyed, while trying to walk on her heels without falling.

Jack frowned at her.

“I don't like how he makes you feel, you know?” he finally replied, calmly. “Where's your sense of adventure, Doctor? It's just something new to try out. Let's have fun with it!”

“Right...” She looked up, taking a deep breath and forcing herself to an encouraging smile. “You're right. Let's do this, captain!”

Jack grinned.

“Let's go, Doc!”

Her new-found lust for adventure lasted for the whole way up the stairs to the third floor, on which Jack had to help her stay on her feet three times, before she got the hang of walking.

That's when they entered the half-filled ball room and stood face to face with their new dancing teacher, who had a stern frown on his beautiful face, his lips betraying it with the beginnings of a smirk.

“Late, Doctor,” the Master greeted her, making her flinch. “As expected.”

She stared at him, her jaw open. She couldn't help it. Here they were, after over a hundred of years - after 36.117 days - and she heard his voice, heard him say her name again and he just.... acted like no time had passed. Except as soon as she had shut the door behind her, he turned away, facing the little crowd that had already gathered before him, not paying her any attention anymore.

Bastard.

She couldn't help but watch him, though, as he gave his instructions. She wasn't surprised, not for a second, that he was their teacher. In hindsight, she probably should've known. He was in his element pushing everyone around and he, sadly, was an exceptional dancer, she knew so from experience.

And right now, he looked beautiful in that dark purple suit of his, purpose on his face, his floppy, dark hair falling into his face, dark eyes gleaming behind long eye-lashes.

She sighed. God, she had missed him, it wasn't fair how much she had missed him and he wanted to play games, wilfully ignored her just to get a rise out of her... Was that really it? Did he really care so little about her, about them? Then again, the fact she hadn't seen him for over a hundred years was evidence enough of that, surely?

“Doctor?” Jack asked, making her flinch for the second time today.

“What?” she asked, trying to seem like a woman that had not just been caught staring at her ex for a little too long.

“We're supposed to pair up and practice the steps he explained to us?” Jack offered, then sighed as he saw her lost expression. “You weren't listening, were you?”

“No, I... I was...”

“Yeah,” Jack replied with a little laugh. “I saw. Doesn't matter, come on, I'll show you the steps.”

She took his outstretched hands and let him lead her clumsily, but still she couldn't really pay attention, not when the Master was walking through the couples closest to her, correcting their postures and making snide remarks about their mistakes. He hadn't changed too much, she realised with a little smile that slipped onto her face against her will and better judgement.

Jack followed her gaze with a rise of his eyebrows.

“Really don't know what you see in him,” he muttered and now it was the Doctor's turn to raise her eyebrows.

“Please. Like you haven't noticed how good he looks.”

“I have. He does. Doesn't make up for what an asshole he is.”

She grinned.

“Yeah well, I don't know. It was always part of his charm.”

“What about it is charming, do tell?” Jack laughed, trying to whirl her around and having to catch her, his hand on her hip steadying.

She saw the Master's head turn from the corner of her eyes, felt the intensity of his gaze on her and quickly turned her back, biting her lip.

“I don't know,” she replied with her voice lowered. “It's just the thrill of knowing you're the only one he's ever sweet to, maybe? And he can be incredibly sweet. If he wants to.”

“It's just that he very rarely wants to,” Jack muttered under his breath, making her chuckle.

“True. But in all fairness, people rarely give him reason to. He's had a rough enough time to at least excuse the mild asshole behaviour.”

Jack snorted.

“You mean the behaviour that does not include murder?”

“Yeah,” she replied with a sigh.

Jack had resigned to simple swaying with her holding his hands and letting him lead her and she was grateful for it, smiling happily as she moved along with his rhythm, until she felt a hand on her hip from behind and one on her shoulder.

“You've not listened at all, have you?” the Master murmured, far too close to her ear and she swallowed hard, trying not to turn around, throw herself into his arms like 17 year old Theta would've done. “You're supposed to stand straight and then actually try out the steps instead of just moving randomly through the room.”

She turned her head ever so slightly, feeling like a snake's prey as she looked into his dark eyes, far too close to hers, could practically smell his breath.

“You try standing straight on heels,” she hissed.

This, truly, hadn't been what she had imagined her first words towards him would be all these lonely nights she had fantasized about seeing him again.

The Master raised a single eyebrow.

“Been there, done that, love.”

Without another word or glance, his hands left her body and he moved on to the next couple, leaving her shaking and completely silent, her lower lip trembling treacherously.

Jack patted her shoulder awkwardly, trying not to draw attention to the fact that she was upset.

“It's alright,” he promised. “We'll pay him back.”

She got her tremble under control within seconds and her eyes gained a cold, determined glare.

“Yeah,” she brought out through gritted teeth. “We will.”

“First of all, we ditch this,” she announced, tearing the dress off her body and to the floor. Jack regarded her with a gently raised eyebrows.

“You know, I had fantasies about this, but somehow, I don't think...”

“Oh, shut up!” she called out, throwing over her shirt and trousers, suspenders snapping.

Jack sighed.

“I doubt that'll impress him much.”

“Of course not,” she gave back with a cool tone. “Next outfit we get better be black and purple.”

“Seriously?” Jack snorted. “That's your big plan?”

“He has a weird thing for fashion,” the Doctor gave back with a shrug – Honestly, she had never quite understood his obsession with it, but that didn't mean she wasn't aware. “And no, that's one tiny part of my big plan. He wants to play? Game's on.”

Jack looked after her, as she paced her room with determination radiating from her in waves and shook his head softly. There she was, the Oncoming Storm he knew and loved and all her power and energy focused on this one man.

By Earth's questionable Gods, he better start being worth it soon.

“Gallifrey,” Jack muttered under his breath as they went to grab dinner. “The most civilised society in the cosmos, I thought. Master of Time and Space. .... Running a canteen?”

“Who the hell told you any of that, the President?” the Doctor smirked back, taking a tray. “We've been civilised a few centuries ago, now we're downright stuck in time. Masters of it, indeed.” She snorted. “They've stopped trying to progress when they reached the peak of their power, deciding this is how they should always be.”

“And this perfected version of them included canteens, yeah?” Jack asked, leaning forward to eye some of the food further. He side glanced at the Doctor, who was filling her tray left and right, a wide smile on her face.

“What?” she asked, dully, as she had a piece of bread between her teeth that wouldn't fit on her tray anymore. “I missed the food, sue me!”

“Nothing, you enjoy yourself,” Jack laughed and took some potions of what he assumed were vegetables to try out.

They sat down together, Jack nervously glancing at all the people in the room watching them, while the Doctor was shoving food into her mouth, happily unaware.

And so he was the one who noticed her stepping up to their table and sitting down elegantly next to the Doctor, watching her stuff even more food into her already full mouth with a disturbed little frown.

“Graceful as ever,” she commented dryly.

The Doctor pulled her face into a grimace and tried to swallow down the masses of food, before finally resigning herself to drink some water and try to fight the massive coughing fit she had gotten into.

Jack leaned over the table, chin on his hands as he grinned up at the Time Lord in front of him.

“So glad to see you again, pretty.”

She looked from Jack to the Doctor, who was still coughing into her goblet, back to Jack, her eyelid twitching once, before she grabbed her tray and got back up, walking to a table at the other side of the hall.

Jack waved her, his eyes seeming weirdly glazed over.

“I wish you'd stop trying to flirt with her,” the Doctor finally brought out, sounding slightly hoarse.

“And we all wish you'd stop spitting food all over your table, but we can't always get what we want, can we?” the Master's voice announced from somewhere behind her, sounding mockingly sweet.

She turned around with a wide smile and a fork in her hand, spread out towards him, not letting herself seem anything but absolutely calm and amused.

“That's very true, we can't. Going to sit down or is that going to annoy your little girlfriend?”

“My girlfriend?” the Master asked, his tone innocent, but his grin widening. “Whoever could you be referring to?”

“The one Jack's so crazy for. You know, you've got to be careful or you loose her. I don't think Jack has even noticed you're here yet.”

Sure enough, the only thing Jack had done to acknowledge his existence was shift slightly to the left so he could look past the Master to the lady of his heart, who was giving him confused glances between bites.

“Oh, her?” the Master asked, an audible laugh in his voice. “Yeah, that's not my girlfriend. That's Braxiatel. But I appreciate the advice.”

With a laugh loud enough to still ring in her ears when he had already wandered off, he left the Doctor stunned and Jack sighing heavily.

“So that's her name? Bit odd, but... Braxiatel Harkness... I don't know, it works, doesn't it? I think it...”

She poked his hand with her fork.

“Ow! Hey!” he called out, jumping out of his daydreaming.

“That's not happening, you hear me?” the Doctor called out, an almost panicked edge in her voice. “No Braxiatel... Ha... Hark.... Ew.” She took another long sip from her drink, as if trying to wash her tongue.

“What's the deal?” he asked, sounding offended and the Doctor looked at him in silent despair.

“She's my brother, Jack. Sister? Brother. Sister. Oh, what do I care. What really matters is.... _EW! Ew, Ew, Ew!”_

Jack looked from her back to Braxiatel and then back to her with a little grimace.

“You can't be serious,” the Doctor begged but he just shrugged.

“I don't know. Somehow, that just made her _more_ attractive?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay but everyone who guessed Brax as the dance teacher last chapter.... you made my entire week, I hope you're aware of that. I have, by now, embraced I am writing a silly lil rom-con and I'm so happy whenever my silly little twists work out LOL


End file.
